Through the Ridicule
by AZ1087653
Summary: Have you ever noticed that days are all the same? The planet turns on its axis and the sun rises, then sets and rises again. All days are essentially the same; we’re just the ones that make them different. JALEX - Warning given, Mature for content.


Hello all. This story is rather different from my norm and is my first drop into the Wizards fandom. I've been reading a lot of Jalex stories, and had to have someone explain what that little word meant. Woe is me. Anyway, this is something I came up with after finishing something for the fiction press page that had a section that went along the same lines. I invite you to please enjoy.

The rating on this story is T, but only because of the story content. There is no actual sex in the story, though there is a conversation about sex later on. If you don't like reading about people contemplating incest, then read something else.

I don't own anything about the characters in this story; they are part of the Wizards of Waverly Place franchise. I also don't own anything that has to do with 'You've Got Mail', 'Jude', or 'Flowers in the Attic' and its successors.

If you want to read the bible of incestuous relationships read the 'Flowers in the Attic' series by VC Andrews.

Plus if the characters seem a little OOC, that's what happens when you get older and go through changes like college or falling in love. Some people just change more than others. This takes place after Justin has gone off to college.

/GG/

Through the Ridicule

Have you ever noticed that days are all the same? The planet turns on its axis and the sun rises, then sets and rises again. All days are essentially the same; we're just the ones that make them different. For Alex Russo, the days were slightly out of the ordinary. She didn't know of anyone else out there who had an older brother who everyone compared her to. A younger brother who looked at life as if it was a game. A set of parents who ran a sandwich shop.

Then there was the fact that her father was teaching all three of his kids how to use powers long forgotten by the bulk of the planet. How to be a wizard.

Yes, that was how her life was just a little bit out of the ordinary. Now keep in mind, they weren't the only wizards out there, but they were the only Russo family and that in and of itself made it unique.

At least that was how it used to be.

/GG/

Alex Russo woke up to the smell of apple crisp. Her candle, the one Justin gave her for her last birthday, had finally come in handy. She had been tired of the old smell of her room the previous night and pulled out the candle. Alex would never have thought Justin would actually get her a present she liked, especially since he rarely paid attention to her in the first place anymore.

That was what happened when you went off to college. You forgot about your parents, your siblings; your previous life. At least was the conclusion Alex came to. Justin had gone from being one of her best friends to just another face in the crowd. She had made a promise that following New Years to never do that to Max. She didn't want him to feel it two fold.

The poor boy was having a hard go of his brother dropping off the face of the Earth. The only good thing that came out of Justin abandoning his family was Max spent a lot more time focusing on wizard training and had all but surpassed Alex. Now Alex had to work even harder to keep up. Before she just had one brother to beat out, now she had two.

She took in a deep breath, surprised her candle hadn't burned out in the night. When she sat up she saw that it hadn't even gone down. Of course! The candle was made from wizard magic; it would never burn out.

That made Alex smile. It was almost a symbol that Justin still cared, even though he didn't show it.

Our girl then jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom to take a shower. It was almost six in the AM and she wanted to make sure she got the hot water first. You'd think with a house full of wizards, they would use their abilities to fix the hot water heater. But no, that wasn't right, fixing something that a human could do with magic was irresponsible and lazy.

Jerry wouldn't let her just zap it, they had to wait until someone could come out, make an assessment, give them an estimate and then charge them an arm and a leg to fix it. What a cruel, cruel world.

Alex turned on the water and stripped from her shorts and tank top. She stepped into the shower and let the hot beads of water splash onto her open skin; moisturizing and cleansing the previous night's contaminants. She loved taking a shower; it was almost like it was washing all the problems of the last day away.

Alex started to rinse her hair and use her citrus smelling shampoo. Then she grabbed a sea sponge and started to clean herself off with body wash. She was just in the middle of rinsing the shampoo off her hair when the door shot open and someone threw up the toilet seat.

The unmistakable sound of a man peeing caused her to cringe. She pulled back the curtain and looked out. Justin was in the middle of relieving himself, turned just enough so Alex couldn't see anything.

"God Justin, knock much?" Alex all but spat at her brother.

"Sorry Alex, but I've been holding it in for over an hour and it was starting to get painful." Justin spoke quietly as he shook himself off and zipped his pants up again.

He turned and faced Alex full force and just about laughed at her expression.

"Don't you dare flush that you..." She couldn't even finish as Justin reached for the handle on the toilet. "Come on Justin, all the hot water will go away when you do that."

Justin grinned and gave Alex an evil look. It was when her face went from disgust to pleading that Justin pulled his hand away and walked out of the bathroom. He couldn't stand to see that look on Alex's face since it reminded him that he was never around to see it or any of her other faces anymore.

Alex watched him leave and finished her shower. She didn't know why he actually listened to her. Sure Justin was the nice and considerate one of the bunch, but that didn't stop him from picking on her whenever he got the chance.

She quickly dried herself off and scurried to her room before any of her other family members woke up. On a normal day, back when her brother was actually living with them, you couldn't have woken Alex up with a blow horn. Now, as with all the other changes going on, Alex was following suit and changing too.

Not becoming more mature by any means, just adapting to being the older sibling in the house. With that came a little responsibility. She found she liked the responsibility, even though Max hardly needed her like he used to, he was after all almost sixteen.

That didn't stop her from trying her hardest to be the older sibling and trying to fit Justin's shoes. She wasn't good at keeping issues from occurring; especially since she was the one who caused most of them. She did what she could though and Max did idolize her, to a point.

Within ten minutes of her little run in with the prodigal son, Alex was dressed and walking downstairs to the kitchen. She could smell eggs and bacon cooking, indicating either Justin being incredibly hungry or her mom, Theresa, having woken up and started making breakfast. As it wasn't even six-thirty yet, she highly doubted it was the second.

"What are you doing here?" Alex asked her brother, who was indeed making eggs and bacon.

She slipped onto a stool and started to pick at the bacon.

"I was hungry." Justin stated, looking at his sister with serious eyes.

"Not making breakfast you dunce, what are you doing back here…at the loft? Don't you have food at the college?"

Justin smiled and started to put bacon into his mouth. "Yeah, but here I know it's not been tampered with."

"Ew." Alex said with a slight twitch. She didn't want to know what went on in a cafeteria, whether it be college or not.

"You asked little sis." Justin said as he filled his plate with eggs and bacon. "Want some?"

Where was this coming from? Usually he didn't even bother with her when he came home; what was with the brotherly attitude?

Justin caught on to what Alex was thinking. He couldn't put his finger on the exact reason he had changed so much. There were two vague ideas he had floating around in his head that could indicate the change by themselves. Justin tended to think it was the two of them together that caused his change in mannerism.

There was a term paper he had done the second semester of his freshman year. It had to do with being the older sibling. How when they were at the home, they had to be the model child, but when they got out on their own, they did all those things they couldn't do because they were trying to be good role models for their siblings.

He fell hard when he got out there and realized in the college world there was a lot more then wizard training he had to worry about. There was survival and he was on his own. No longer did he have his sister and brother as that cushion he was used to at home. Out there it was just him. He had to swim because sinking wasn't an option.

Then there was the other thing. The thing he couldn't talk about.

Alex was looking at him with a strange expression on her face. That was an expression she usually reserved for her many boyfriends. One of desire, but also of curiosity. She wanted to be with them, but was curious as to how to do it.

Of course she was his sister, not one of her boyfriends. She must have had that look because she missed him and was curious as to why he was trying to hide.

A feeling of sorrow hit him as he realized his little separation had been harder on his family then he had thought. They still had each other; he had to take care of himself. Alex was looking rather lonely though as he had a conversation with himself.

She was more than a sister; she was his best friend. The one he could tell everything to. No matter who else came into his life, he still had to keep his being a wizard away from them. With Alex, he didn't have too. Like he had told Crumbs; she was the reason he got to work hard. Without her, he wouldn't have been the wizard he was today.

"I was thinking." He said as he filled a plate for Alex. "I was thinking of either coming around more often or asking mom and dad if I could move back in again. That way I could save some money. I got that full ride scholarship, but I've not got a job, so all of my savings are going toward food and everything. If I move back home, then I could work at the sub shop and not spend all of my money onfood."

Alex took her plate and contemplated his thought for a moment. She was just getting the hang of being the older sibling and now he wanted to take that away from her. On the other hand, she would graduate in a semester so it wasn't like she would have to compete for long.

"Whatever." Alex said, stuffing bacon into her mouth.

She stood up and walked over to the sofa to watch the news, she wanted to show her long lost brother that they didn't need him anymore. She could be the older sibling without his assistance.

/GG/

True to his word, Justin moved back in within the month. His room hadn't been changed; Theresa couldn't deal with it being stripped and turned into a guest room or exercise room or the like. His action figures were still on display and his posters still attached to the wall.

It didn't really feel like he was coming home though. It felt as if he was moving out all over again. Justin had been a vagabond, he didn't have a home and now the one place he thought he belonged didn't feel right either.

Everything had changed.

He wasn't a part of the family; he was an interloper, he didn't belong.

"Justin!" He was brought out of his trance by the scream of his brother. "Dinner rush, we need you!"

"Coming." Justin said, a little bit softer than his brother had shouted.

He ran down the stairs and into the shop. There was quite a line of customers, so at least Max hadn't been playing a joke on him.

Justin walked over to the counter and started taking orders so the customers could go sit down. When the customers were taken care of he would go help his dad with the sandwiches. For now he was content to work along side his sister as she and he took orders.

"Harper!" Alex said happily as her friend reached the front of the line.

"Hi Alex, Justin…this is…" Harper began. "Wait a minute, when did you get back? Are you back?" Harper asked Justin as he finished taking an order for one of the last customers at the counter.

"Um, hi Harper. Yeah, I'm back. Trying to save money, you know how it is."

"Not really." She shook her head, smiling. "This is Craig, we met in an Internet chatroom. We had no idea we lived in the same city. Very 'You've Got Mail' don't you think?"

Harper was happy and both Justin and Alex could tell. On a normal day she would have been gushing over Justin like he was the second coming. She was either maturing or actually had fallen for this guy. Whatever it was, Justin was glad she wouldn't be following him around like a love sick puppy dog.

"Good to meet you Craig." Justin said shaking the man's hand. "How long have you and Harper been Internet chatting?"

"About a year and a half. She said this other guy she liked went away to college and forgot about her. I've been trying to lift her spirits." Craig said.

Justin felt like turning himself invisible with that comment. He and Alex glanced at each other and silently told the other that this was a good thing. Besides, she and Craig made a cute couple.

"Now all we need to do is find someone for the two of you and all of us will have a special someone to spend time with." Harper said. "Oh, we'd like the club sandwich and a soda with two straws."

"Oh, that is so cute." Alex said, in that raised voice she used to use a few years ago. "They make the cutest couple, don't ya think?"

Justin smiled. His Alex was still in there, even if she had hid it behind an icy exterior. He looked at his sister, a grin plastered on his face.

"Not that it really means anything." She said, turning distant again.

"You can't fool me little sis, I know you're in there." Justin said under his breath as he walked into the back to help his dad with the sandwiches.

He kept an eye on Alex through the picture window though. She would occasionally glance back and catch his eye, causing him to smile and she to turn her head away from him. He was going to break her down and find his little sister again if it was the last thing he ever did.

For now though, he still had to work on sandwiches. Jerry had welcomed his son back with open arms, though the relationship felt different to Justin. He and his father still acted the same toward each other. It had been almost two weeks since Justin's reappearing act. Jerry no longer treated Justin like a kid; but as a man. Either way they still put on a good show for the customers and the rest of the family. In fact, you wouldn't even have been able to tell Justin had gone at all if you weren't in the know.

/GG/

"Alex!" Jerry shouted making her wonder why everyone always had to shout in this family.

"Yes daddy?" Alex said, getting ready to use the puppy dog eyes since Jerry didn't sound too happy.

"Didn't I tell you we were going to wait to get the hot water heater fixed after the rush season?"

Jerry was fuming. His rules were always being broken and he was ready for that to stop.

"I didn't touch the hot water heater." Alex protested.

"Then why does it work?"

"Because the guy who was going to fix it came and fixed it… I don't know. I'm not the hot water heater's keeper."

"Don't get smart with me young lady."

"But da-ad." Alex said, realizing the puppy dog look might not work if Jerry was this upset. She hadn't seen her dad this mad since Max started a fire in the lair using a spell that wasn't meant for indoors. "I didn't do it. I promise."

She was telling the truth too. Alex didn't touch the heater. It was beneath her.

"Then if you didn't touch it who did?" Jerry asked. He was confused.

"I don't know. Maybe it was Justin or Max. I'm sure neither of them have been to happy about taking cold showers."

"What about cold showers?" Theresa asked, walking into the room with a hand full of groceries. Justin and Max at her heal.

"The hot water heater is working again." Jerry said, eyeing his two other children.

"Oh good, you had that man come and fix it. I was tired of cold showers." Theresa, completely clueless as to the annoyance Jerry was emanating, said walking into the kitchen and started to put the groceries away.

"That's the problem Theresa." Jerry said, following his wife into the kitchen. "I didn't have the maintenance man come by here. It just…magically…fixed itself." Jerry said, glaring at his kids.

"Relax dad, it was me." Justin said, handing his dad some pudding cups and effectively taking Jerry's mind off the hot water heater. He could feel the tension in the room and mouthed 'sorry' to Alex for doing something that caused her to take the brunt of the attack.

"Don't tell me you used magic to fix the heater Justin." Theresa said with a slight tone.

"No mom, I went down there and fixed it with my bare hands. I was tired of getting up at five so I could beat the family princess to some of the hot water."

Alex snorted and everyone else stared.

"You…" Alex coughed. "You fixed the hot water heater with tools. How does a tool who couldn't work a blender know how to use tools to fix a heater?"

"Good come back Al, but I've lived in a dorm for over a year, I know how to patch things up. It's still going to require a professional, but we should get by for a month or two…at most."

Theresa beamed. "Look Jerry, our baby is turning into a handy man. Who would have ever thought our Justin would have figured out how to become so handy around the house."

"Mom." Justin blushed. He realized this was the first time all of them were acting like he had never left and he relished it. "I am a man."

This time Alex laughed. "Yeah you are."

"Thanks a lot Alex." Justin said at the same time his father gave her a warning by clearing his throat.

"I'm sorry. Did I hurt your widdle feewings?" Alex asked, walking over to her brother and resting her head on his shoulder.

This was something she wouldn't have done in the past and she had no idea why she was doing it now. It just felt right.

"Alex, be nice to your brother." Theresa said as she finished putting groceries away.

"You two are starting to act weird. I hope whatever you have isn't catching." Max said as he shook his head and left the room looking for video games.

He caught it, but he doubted anyone else did. Alex and Justin were changing and not for the good. At least not for the good of society. To him, it was a long time in coming and perhaps because the two of them were too close to the situation, they didn't know quite how to proceed.

Back in the kitchen both Alex and Justin realized the brotherly/sisterly affection had gone on quite long enough and broke apart. That was more than enough for the both of them to take a serious breath and think about a few things.

They eyed each other and then decided to go separate ways.

"I'm gonna stay on campus this week. I've got midterms due." Justin said, going for his overnight bag.

"Good luck honey." Theresa called after her eldest.

Alex watched her brother go and her heart felt like it was breaking as the door closed on him. Why, she didn't know, but there was something there that didn't bode quite right in her thought process. What she didn't know was Justin was thinking the same thing.

/GG/

When Justin came back at the end of the week Alex was waiting for him. She had spent an entire week trying to figure out what was going on. She had spoken with Harper and even her mother about her thoughts, she just let the fact that her brother was involved slip through the cracks.

Everyone told her she had a crush and she needed to act on it, either to confront the one she liked or to drop it and move on. First came the denial stage. Alex knew the stages were usually reserved for grief, but she had a feeling she was in quite a bit of emotional grief at the moment anyway, so they would fit her present situation perfectly.

She watched as the door opened and Justin waltzed in. He took one look at her and smiled. Alex just watched for a moment then ran down the stairs into the shop and outside to the court. She didn't want to deal with it. When he wasn't around she could deny everything.

Justin watched her fleeting form and for a moment thought about running after her. He had come to the conclusion that she had been upset about his being there. Maybe she was annoyed about his stealing her thunder.

If he could only just talk to her then he could explain why he had run and come back. It had all started out as just going away for college and ended up becoming so much more.

"Justin, what are you staring at?"

Max brought Justin out of his thoughts. The older brother looked at the younger brother. The younger becoming a man more and more every day. He was losing that tweenage physique and had started to look like a teenager. The kid even acted more like a teenager.

"Can I ask you to keep an open mind and a secret from everyone, including Vanessa?"

"What's this got to do with Ness?" Max asked, eyes narrowed.

"This has nothing to do with your girlfriend Max. It has to do with me and I need someone to talk to."

"So it has nothing to do with Ness, you're not crushing on her or something."

"Don't flatter yourself." Justin said quietly.

"Okay." Max said, bouncing into the kitchen and grabbing a huge sandwich from the refrigerator. He plopped himself down on the sofa and waited for Justin to join him.

Justin raised his eyebrows and watched Max start to eat the sandwich. God that kid could eat.

"I think I'm in love." Justin said quietly. So quiet in fact that Max couldn't hear him.

"What?" Max asked, food specks being spit from his mouth.

Justin wiped his face with his shirt sleeve and started again. "I think I'm in love. Not like that love I felt when I was crushing on a girl, but an honest to goodness, I could see myself growing old with her and dying with her love."

Max's eyes got wide. "Really? It's not Harper is it?"

Justin shook his head and snickered. "As much as I would have fun telling her I finally share her feelings, it's not Harper."

Max got onto his knees like he'd seen Alex do, too many times to count. He was interested in finding this out.

"Who is it? Do I know her? Is it a 'her'?"

Justin laughed at the thought. "You'd really be okay if I was in love with a guy?"

"Sure, why not. It's not like we're in the 90's. Things like that are much more accepted now."

For a moment Justin thought this was too good to be true. If Max was okay with homosexuality, then maybe he wouldn't be opposed to his being in love with his own sister.

"There was a reason I left to go to college instead of going to the community college down the street." Justin started, hoping no one would come into the room while he was spilling his feelings all over the floor.

"Really, we know her that well?" Max actually had an idea where this was headed. There wasn't much to figure out. With the running off as soon as school had ended and the little glances here and there. The two of them were just screaming taboo.

"Yeah and it's wrong on so many levels."

"You know." Max said, taking another bite of his sandwich. "Royalty used to get together with their cousins and siblings because they needed to keep the blood line 'clean'." More food particles sprayed from his mouth.

Had he said anything else Justin would have told Max to grow some manners, but as it was his little brother not only hit the nail on the head, he managed to hammer it down to the wood.

"You know." Justin choked on his own saliva.

"It wasn't hard to figure it out. You two have been dancing around one another for some time. Someone obviously played one cruel joke on the two of you though, making you brother and sister. It's actually kinda creepy."

Max had actually been contemplating this for a couple of weeks and gotten used to the idea. It wasn't like someone could fall in love with whomever you choose. Love seemed to be a completely random thing, real love at least.

Justin glared at his brother. "You mean she feels the same way?"

"Probably. She's just going through the stages. Right now it's probably denial. Give if a month or so. By then she might have reached acceptance. Then you can talk to her. Until then I'd lay it low. It's still kind of illegal to get together with your own siblings…at least I think it is."

Max jumped off the sofa and went for a bottle of orange soda. He wanted to take his food to his room while his parents weren't looking. This was the perfect time.

Justin just sat there in complete confusion. Had he really just come out to his brother about having feelings for his sister that weren't of a brotherly nature? Or was all of that just a dream. He wasn't sure for the time, but he now needed to know with an almost primal desire.

Did Alex really feel the same way?

/?/?/?/?/?/?/?

Denial was one of the toughest stages to go through. It's the one where you tell yourself it's not happening or it didn't happen. This stage is also the scariest for those who know what's coming – anger.

Alex didn't want to feel anger. She was just getting used to her brother being home again. She didn't like how different it had been when he had moved out. She wanted everything to go back to normal. The normal where she tormented her brother and he got her out of trouble. Her crushing on him wasn't part of the plan. It was wrong or obviously it wasn't happening.

There was no way it could be.

A fleeting bout of dizziness washed over Alex, followed by the need to vomit. She ran over to a bush and heaved into the branches. She felt someone come up behind her and pull her hair out of her face. The touch was kind enough she didn't worry about it for the time. She just continued heaving until her stomach started heaving up hydrochloric acid; burning her throat.

This caused her to cough and sputter as she turned around and sat on the bench. She looked over at the kind lady who had held her hair.

"Thanks." She choked, lowering her head and wiping her face.

"Are you okay hon?" The lady asked, handing Alex a mint.

"I'll be okay. Must be something I ate. I should go home and sleep." Alex stood up and took the mint. "Thanks." She said, holding it up and putting it into her mouth. Then she took off down the street.

When she got home she saw her family all in the family room watching a baseball game. She nodded and sped up the stairs without so much as a hello. Her mom would be up to check on her soon and Justin too. If she got under the covers and pretended to sleep, then maybe it would all go away.

/GG/

Anger ended up coming full force, and while Alex was working on wizard work. Not exactly something she wanted to feel while she had a wand in her hand. As it was, she ended up causing a cyclone in the lair and turning the room into so much rubble.

After finishing with turning off the winds, she shouted a number of profanities at her dad and brother and ran out of the room before she blew up again.

"Max, do you know what's been going on with your sister?" Jerry asked as he showed Max how to clean up the rubble using magic.

On a normal day he would have had Alex come and the three of them would have picked it up by hand, but he didn't want to bother his little girl at the moment. This was worse than PMS.

"She's a girl, she's eighteen and she's going to be graduating soon. What else is there?" Max said as he flicked the wand and cleaned up the room.

"I don't know, but that was strange. First she doesn't want anything to do with us and then she's ready to turn us into slices salami."

"Relax dad." Max said, putting an arm around Jerry's shoulders. "She's a girl. She'll get over it."

/?/?/?/?/?/?

Alex ran upstairs into the loft and saw her brother sitting on the sofa. For a moment her heart melted, and then it froze like spit in the wind on a freezing day.

"What are you looking at Justin?" She snarled; something she didn't mean to say; it just kinda came out.

Justin opened his eyes in surprise; then realized she must have hit the anger stage. It took a little bit longer than he had anticipated, but he had enough patience to wait until she was ready to talk.

The two started at each other for a few minutes, gazes locked in a temporal flux. It was as if time had stopped on the two of them and there was nothing else in the universe. Both of them realizing what was going on inside of themselves, but Alex still not ready to accept it yet.

"What are you starting at? Haven't you got anything better to do?" She snipped as she hightailed it upstairs, leaving Justin to try and figure out what just happened.

In her room Alex paced back and forth, breaking things and then fixing them with her wand. She came to the picture she had of the two of them as babies. Alex had just been brought home from the hospital and Justin was seeing her for the first time.

She glared at the photo for a moment and then blasted it to pieces. She watched as the photo bits burned into nothingness. There was no way to fix that photo. It was gone forever and she doubted her mother would give her another one if she told her the reason it was gone.

This caused her to crash to the ground in gut wrenching sobs. She had just destroyed the picture taken at the moment the love of her life and she had laid eyes on one another. Not many others had that available to them.

She sat next to the foot of her bed and rocked back and forth as tears streaked down her cheeks and landed on her shirt.

"I'll do whatever you want." She said out loud. "Just make these feelings go away. It's not fair to do this to me or to him when he finds out about my horrible thoughts."

She stood up and went to her bed, grabbed a pillow and placed it over hear face and screamed.

"I'll do anything."

Bargaining had come within moments of anger.

/GG/

Justin and Max were in the lair practicing after a long week of school. Justin was close to finals; in fact they were a week away. Jerry wanted them to learn a few new spells for the new term. Max was going to Wiz Tech soon and would need to test for his new levels.

Max accomplished the spells in record time, much to Justin's surprise. Max had questions though, so he had planned to finish early.

"Let me ask you a question." Max said as the two of them finished cleaning up the lair for Alex's time.

"Shoot." Justin said as he put the scrolls away.

"What exactly did you do when you realized you had a thing for Alex, how did it happen exactly?"

"Actually it was rather embarrassing." Justin said, sitting on a sofa and closing his eyes.

"I was having a dream one night that I was apparently speaking out loud during. I kept calling out Alex's name. My roommate came over to me and woke me up. When he did and I sat up I felt a hard on the likes of which I'd never felt before."

"I've had those. Never about my own sister though, Ness, every night." Max said laughing.

"We are boys, though truth be told, girls do that too, they just don't have the same kind of obvious reminder of their wet dreams we have. They can hide it, we can't." Justin said snickering.

"I don't think we've ever had this talk before. Dad tried to tell me once, but he did a bad job of it. He kept sputtering as he was telling me what to expect, with the wood I mean. It was pretty funny."

"I hear ya." Justin laughed. "When we had the talk though, mom was there and she kept coughing because she didn't want her baby to be introduced to all that bad stuff."

"Do you think our powers have anything to do with some of the dreams we have?"

"No, but the things we run into might. Though I gotta tell you, I told god I'd be willing to give up my powers if he took the feelings I had for Alex away. That was my bargain. Take them away and I'd give up being a wizard."

Max shot up straight. Eyes wider than the Grand Canyon.

"Did you really?" That was something he didn't expect. Justin had always been so intent on keeping his powers, he doubted there was anything Justin would have wanted of anyone.

"Yeah and truth be told, I'd give them up for a completely different reason right now. I'd give them up for her."

"You do have it bad don't you." Max stated. "What else did you do, besides offering to give up being a wizard I mean?"

Justin thought for a moment; then looked at Max. "When I first realized something had happened it was just after I started having the dreams. I thought maybe I was just having some sort of issues with the loss of my family. The problem heightened when I started having not just dreams about Alex, but sex dreams about her. I was coming so often I had to clean my sheets daily. I don't remember all of the dreams, but some of them were pretty intense."

"Then when I came home for Thanksgiving and I saw Alex for the first time and she came over to give me a hug, I shoved her away. I didn't want her to see I had started to get a hard on with just a little touch. So I pretended indifference. I felt if I could push her away, keep her at arms length it would just go away."

Justin looked around the room and his eyes landed on his brother.

"That was my denial. By Christmas, when it didn't go away I got angry. That was when Alex and I had our little falling out that pushed us far enough away we wouldn't have to deal with each other."

"I remember that day. You were pretty mad at all of us. I thought you had decided we weren't worth anything anymore." Max said sadly.

Justin turned over on the sofa and smiled at his brother. "I never stopped loving any of you. Do you see Alex's own actions mirroring my own? This is what I went through; only it was easier because I could run away. Poor Alex can't."

"After that I did start bargaining and then went into depression. I actually got a B in a class and that made me even more depressed. It wasn't until I came home and saw her in the shower that I finally came to accept everything. Right about the time she started to feel the first stage. That's why I moved back. I wanted to see if I was actually in love with her or if I was imagining it."

"That's intense. I hope I never have to go through that. I think it's kind of strange the two of you going through that though. It's kind of like that movie 'Jude'. The one where he wants to get together with his cousin and she won't until she goes through the stages too."

"I know the movie you're talking about Max. I watched it with you, remember, less then a month ago."

"Oh right, that was you." Max said sitting up.

"Max, when did you get to be so smart?" Justin asked.

"I had a good teacher." The boy answered, leaving his brother to think.

/GG/

Alex's depression had an effect on the entire household. No one wanted to hang around with one another. Max and Justin knew what was going on and gave her some space, but poor Theresa and Jerry were receiving the brunt of her attacks.

At one point both parents had enrolled her into counseling, which she went to but never talked during. Her grades began to slip and Harper actually stopped coming over.

She skipped her own graduation, much to her parent's anger. Alex was lucky her grades slipping happened so close to the end of the semester. She couldn't drop far enough to fail if she had tried. She still got into college and by the time her parents and brothers returned from her missed graduation, she had taken what she wanted and moved out.

Max actually found Justin crying in the bathroom later on that day, after putting up a brave face for his parents. There was nothing he could do to help his brother or his parents except be there for all of them.

Justin became miserable and rather withdrawn. He decided to go to summer school and see if he could graduate early. There was a job opening at the campus bank he took as a work study. He knew he just needed to hang on and Alex would more than likely come back. Then the two of them could have a proper sit down and discuss what was on both of their minds. So he just continued working; both at the sub shop and at school, hoping she would return soon.

Alex had gone away to find herself, but ended up finding trouble. She hooked up with a few strangers for one night stands, which caused her to become even more depressed. They weren't what she needed. She was in love with what she couldn't have and she was running into the arms of others to help her ease the pain.

There was nothing she could do until she accepted her feelings. If she ever got around to it.

/?/?/?/?/?/?

Alex returned to her apartment on campus to find the school news paper stuck to her door. She grabbed it and walked inside. There was a party that night she wanted to get ready for, but she decided to check out the news paper first. Almost like there was someone leading her actions.

The front part of the news paper showed the usual campus garbage, but the next page told of a student who had been shot in an attempted robbery at the school bank. That student was Justin Russo.

/GG/

Alex went to the news paper headquarters and asked where Justin had been taken and if he was dead. The editor told her that Justin was still alive when they had written the piece and was in ICU at Mercy Hospital.

She didn't waste any time. She left the room and caught a cab to the hospital. She couldn't let him die before he knew what her feelings were. That wouldn't have been fair to either of them. Especially since it took so long for her to come to terms with her desire.

The cab made it to the hospital almost an hour after she caught it. She spent every last penny she had getting there, but that didn't matter. She had come to accept her fate. She was in love with her brother and there wasn't a force in this universe that could change her mind.

Alex ran into the hospital and right up to reception. She then ran toward his room, thoughts of him dying running through her head.

There was a nurse attending to him when she ran into the room. Justin was stripped of his clothing and receiving a bath and fresh bandages.

"I'm sorry ma'am, but we're in the process of cleaning him off. We can't have anyone in here." The gentleman said as he turned Justin onto his side and started to wash his back.

The young wizard broke down. "He's my brother. I just found out he was here. Please don't make me leave the room." She wiped the tears from her eyes and looked at the nurse.

"Okay, if I let you stay, then I need you to remain over there. We have a code to follow and we're not supposed to allow anyone but his parents or his spouse be in here while we're bathing him; even if he is your brother."

Alex nodded and watched the man go down toward Justin's backside, cleaning him of the hospital stench that would soon permeate his skin again. The bath didn't take long and soon Justin was dressed and sleeping soundly on his bed.

"What's the matter with him, what happened?" Alex asked.

The nurse took pity on her and handed her the chart. Part of it didn't mean anything to her, but the part about the gunshot to the lung was sticking out on the page as if it were highlighted. He was in a medically induced coma and was to remain there until he was able to breathe on his own again. There was nothing on the chart that indicated when he would be able to breathe again though.

After the nurse left Alex went and sat on the chair next to Justin's bed. The area around his eyes was black, giving them a very hollow appearance. He looked so weak with all those machines attached to his form.

Alex reached her hand over and caressed his face and then moved lower on his body toward the bandage covering his wound. People lived after being shot on a daily basis, but people also died from gunshot wounds too. This might very well have been the last time she would get to tell him anything while there was still consciousness left in his body.

"Justin?" She asked, wondering if he could hear her. She had read somewhere that people in a coma could still hear. She hoped that was true.

"Justin I gotta tell you something. I guess now is the best time to talk to you since there's no way you can interrupt." Alex laughed quickly since it was kind of funny, but then the seriousness of the situation found her again and she started wiping tears away from her eyes.

"I can't believe you got shot in a bank robbery. You know I used to watch you from the tree outside the window of the bank, when you weren't looking. You're so good with the customers. Now look at you. I used to think of you as my invincible brother. I guess you're not so invincible are you?"

Alex reached over to grab hold of the hand that didn't have an IV line attached to it and pulled it toward her face. She used his fingers to wipe a few more tears from her eyes.

"Please don't ask me to explain too much, not that you could ask right now I guess, but I've got to tell you how much I care about you. I don't know when this happened but it did. Probably over time and I'm hoping it was supposed to happen…us… I mean." She rambled and lowered her face to the bed, next to his arm.

"I don't know if there will be an 'us', but I do know I have to tell you how much I love you." Alex felt a sense of pride as she said those words. Sure he was out like a light, but that didn't mean she hadn't finally come clean.

"I love you with every ounce of my being and I know you're wondering why I sound so grown up right now. It's because I had a lot of time to grow up while I was out there. You were right; it's a big change to leave from your family."

Alex stood up and lowered her face to his and kissed his chapped lips. Possibly the only time she would ever kissed him and not have him shudder with disgust. "I love you." She said again as she kissed him on the lips one more time. This time lingering a little bit more than the last.

"But even if you turn me down, please don't die on me. I don't think I could handle you dying on me Justin."

She contorted herself enough to lie on the bed next to him, wrapping her arms around his chest. That was how her parents found her a few hours later when they were able to get back to the hospital.

Both Jerry and Theresa welcomed their daughter with open arms and helped her move back home. Just like with Justin, her room had remained the same. Neither could fathom tearing it apart. If they did that then it would have been like killing her rather than thinking she was out there somewhere just waiting to come home.

For three weeks all four of the Russo clan that were still walking would go and visit Justin. The doctors said he was improving slowly and were going to take him out of his coma in less then a week. That was all it took, less than a month of recovery and he would be awake again.

They didn't get the chance to wait for the doctors to wake him up.

/GG/

Alex walked into the hospital for her regular visit. She usually spent the better part of the morning with Justin, reading him graphic novels and telling him about what's been going on. She relished those times because it was just the two of them and she could pretend he was in love with her as much as she was with him.

That was all Alex wanted, to imagine he felt the same way.

She sat down with the new X-Men comic book that came out just the day before. She had gone to the crazy comic stand and stood in line for an hour to get the damn thing. It was worth it though, just to be able to read it to him while he couldn't read it himself.

The comic, although not her thing, was actually something she kind of started to like. She didn't know if that was because of how she felt about the man she was reading to or if it was actually because she had grown to like them.

Either way, the voice that brought her out of the story was still a surprise.

"Alex?" The voice of Justin called, weakly.

For a moment Alex couldn't decide whether she wanted to scream, faint, run or all three. Instead she just sat there with a dumb look on her face.

"J-j-justin?" She mumbled softly.

"Hi." He smiled weakly, trying to lift his arm to her.

"Don't move." She croaked, jumping up and sitting on the bed next to his. She grabbed his hand and put it to her lips and kissed each of his fingers.

"I'm so sorry." She said, tears falling onto his hands.

"I heard you Alex." He whispered. "I came back for you."

Alex felt a heart palpitation as he spoke. He had heard her.

"So you know?" She asked, waiting for him to tell her how disturbed she was.

"I do." He answered.

The experience was rather surreal. She couldn't believe she was having this conversation. And a couple of days before she was supposed to. It reminded her of the movies, his talking to her and telling her that he heard every word she had uttered.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

"I should be the one asking you that, not you asking me."

"No, I need to ask you that. I know what you went through and I'm sorry you had to go it alone."

"What do you mean Justin?" Alex asked, again putting his hand to her face. The fact that he wasn't trying to remove it from her grip was giving her a small amount of hope.

"I love you too Alex."

Another palpitation.

"I have since I left for college. I just didn't know it then."'

"Are you sure this isn't because you're on high doses of medication?" Alex asked, thinking she was dreaming.

"No, and you can ask Max if you don't believe me."

There was a communal silence between the two of them for a few moments as they both contemplated each other's expressions. Both of them had agreed that they cared for one another in a way society would most definitely frown upon. Neither of them seemed to blink at the thought though.

"You do realize this is gonna be hard." Alex stated. "We're gonna end up being like those people on "Flowers in the Attic" and when it gets out we'll be ridiculed like no tomorrow."

Justin chuckled, not only because of what Alex said, but because he had actually read the book series so he knew what she was talking about.

"We'll go through the ridicule together." Justin said, coughing up large amounts of phlegm that Alex wiped from his mouth.

"Are you sure we can handle it?"

Of course she knew he could handle it, he was her brother and he could do anything. It was herself she was worried about.

"We'll take it one step at a time."

Justin smiled at his sister, who had just become so much more. She stood up and leaned in to place a kiss on his lips. Only this time he kissed her back.


End file.
